LADY'S YEARLY EXAM
I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse started with certain basics.
"How much do you weigh?" she asked.
"135," I said. The nurse put me on the scale. It turns out my weight is 180.
The nurse asked, "Your height?" "5 foot 4," I said.
The nurse checked and saw that I only measure 5'2"
She then took my blood pressure and told me that it is very high.
"Of course it's high!" I screamed, 'When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I'm short and fat!"
She put me on Prozac. What a bitch.
I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends.
One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been
married for 20+ years.
We were chatting about our relationships and decided
to amaze our men by greeting them at the door
wearing a black bra, black panties, black stiletto heels and a black mask over our eyes.
We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes.
Well, here's how it all went.
My engaged friend:
The other night when my boyfriend came over he
found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.
He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams.
I love you..' Then we made passionate love all night long.
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was
wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and
mask over my eyes.. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word,
but he started to tremble and we had wild sex all night.
When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra,
black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes.
When he came in the door and saw me he said,