My dinner with Luke

Got dinner on the table late as usual and as usual the two of us, my son & I, had our reading material all around us. We eat at the kitchen island because it is usually just the two of us (plus the two animals clamoring for food). His sports magazines and my newspapers from the morning are usually still shrewn around. Sometime I say, " put the magazine away" in an attempt to have normal dinner conversation, but a lot of the time I just let us read cause we are together so much that I don't think that we have to "make dinner conversations" - it's exhausting anyway, trying to pry information from a twelve year old, ie: "what did you do at school today?, "nothing".
He sometimes reads me some sports trivia that I don't have a clue about and tonite I read to him from one of the articles in the newspaper that I 've been saving to read- about this 19 yr. old Indian American Harvard student who got a book deal for 500,000(at age 17!) His response - "what's she need 500,000 dollars for? she's in college.
And I answered(seeing an opportunity for some of that "good dinner conversation," well why do those sports heroes have to make millions of dollars? what about the firefighters saving lives, they're the heroes and they don't make much. His comeback was "well, Jackie Robinson" was a hero- he was one of the first black players" and I said "yea, I bet he didn't make much."
One of our better dinner conversations I'd say.

Joke Friday

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed: "Dear Lord: I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen.

God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish. The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman. He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, Set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the checkbook.

He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog. Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework, Then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.
After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed. At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.

The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said, Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day.
Please, oh please, let us trade back."
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied, "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night."

Voted Women's Favorite Email of the Year

Slacker

Here it is Hump Wednesday and I haven't posted since my little poll on Sat. and the post before that was on my abandoned blog. So what's up with that? Let's see for excuses I have 1) my little "procedure" 2) school vacation week 3) someone's always playing Texas hold-em when I'm ready to post; but these are lame excuses as I 1) have the week off 2) the boy is in baseball camp for 4 hrs. in the morning and 3) I do have a laptop that i never use.
So what is my problem? Am I losing interest? Is the bloom off the rose? I had all good intentions of 1) getting my house cleaned 2) attacking my paper clutter/get my papers/life organized 3) attempting some writing (enter a poem in the next carnival).
So I guess the only answer is I am a terrible slacker. Sounds like a title of one of those Series of unfortunate events books that the boy reads. Or maybe it's the 2 hrs. I waste watching American Idol. Whatever it is I am feeling pathetic; I will attack that draft file with a vengence.... later- i'm not done slackin.

Your opinion counts

Something I've been mulling over for awhile. Should've put this up for Valentines Day.

Do you think:
a) opposites attract?
b) birds of a feather are better?
c) or is this really just G-d's little joke watching men and woman trying to get along

And which combination is better for a marraige or long-term relationship
a) opposites
b) birds of a feather
c) none of the above or other?

Joke Friday

George W. was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the creek below.

Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, three kids, who were fishing, pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted.

The first kid said, "I want to go to Disneyland."
George said, "No problem. I'll take you there on Air Force One".

The second kid said, "I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan's."
George said, "I'll get them for you and even have Michael sign them!"

The third kid said, "I want a motorized wheelchair with a built-in TV and stereo headset!!"
Bush is a little perplexed by this and says, "But you don't look like you are handicapped."

The kid says, "I will be after my dad finds out I saved your ass from drowning!"

Abandoned blog

I've been feeling remiss this week on not having posted since Sun. But you know.. "Life's what happens while you're making other plans." I don't know where I read that but it's so true. Anyway I've been a little preoccupied of late- introspective i guess. Anyway I'm off today and going into the big city - Boston- for a little procedure ( nothing remotely life threatening). So maybe i'll blog about it, maybe i won't.

Weekend whiteout

Views from my window. Wish i had a better camara, but this was my first digital. Really glad I filled those bird feeders yesterday, looks like they are too.
The fat squirrel looks like one of those guys in Atlantic City, NJ at the all you can eat buffets.
He profited from my ADD style of filling the bird feeders- bring bag out on deck and leave on table to the next day.

Joke Friday

The Pasta Diet

1) You walka pasta da bakery.
2) You walka pasta da candy store.
3) You walka pasta da Ice Cream shop.
4) You walka pasta da table and fridge.

And for those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on
nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all the
conflicting medical studies:

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks
than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than
Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks
than Americans.

4. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer
fewer heart attacks than Americans.

5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausage and suffer
fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Help

Todays patient,a diabetic, tells me he cheats, then feels guilty. We get into a fairly lengthy discussion about this.
After finishing the next patient, I notice that he has left his hot chocolate behind and I go out to the waiting room to find him to give it to him.
I find him in the optical shop; he looks up and sees me and smiles and says," I know I left it." I say jokingly, "Yeah, I confiscated it."
he smiles and puts up his hand and says "that's ok - thanks."
Sometimes I am the one giving the help(not like in my previous work posts, in which the patients brought words of wisdom to me); but like this pep talk to a diabetic about how food = medicine but don't beat yourself up over it. Sometimes when people are worried and nervous,a line I use alot is," don't worry till you have something to worry about."

Called out sick

today, there was no way i could drag my tired body into work. My back was hurting real bad last night so I took a pain pill, when it didn't seem to be doing the trick, i remembered that it said take 1 or 2 every 4 hrs. as needed so i took a second. I was sure that I would be out like a light in no time. The exact opposite happenned, i was wide awake most of the night. At 2 in the morning I decided to take 2 more for the pain cause i didn't realize at the time that they seemed to be having an opposite affect to sleepiness. So this morning when i dragged myself to the phone to call in and realized just how bad I did feel - dizzy and all, I attempted to go back to bed and get some rest. But 1/2 hr. later when i was just falling off, the damn phone rang, my supervisor from work, calling to beg me to come in this afternoon if i felt beter because they were so shorthanded. Then 1/2 hr. later and the door bell is ringing - the electrician - now he gets here! I wish i coulda curled up like the perfect looking little angel here.

Halftime

Wow! What about that Mick Jagger and the Stones?? Not your average 60 yr. old. He's skinnier than most 20 yr. olds. Now - he can wear a belly shirt, no problem. How do they stay so thin? drugs?? are they vegetarians?? They're nothing short of incredible. If it weren't for them and the commercials I'd be asleep.

ADD posting

(This is a draft from Nov. 5th., i just couldn't delete it, i'm going thru my drafts folder one by one and deleting or posting or saving)

I just realized that I write like I do everything and maybe this is the problem. Do I have ADD? I tend to jump from one thing to another, be it housecleaning, yardwork, and now even writing. I start a post, get an idea for another, just don't want to finish the one I'm working on it seems; jump from one to another. I know i've written about this before in terms of my housekeeping ability or should i say disability. And I always thought that maybe it was just because housekeeping is just so boring, mundane. but writing is fluid, different, thought provoking. So then it must just be a flaw of mine. No stickwithitness, when the blogging gets tough the blogger goes surfing. Also the problem with all these drafts is that they're not in real time and may not reflect what's going on now.

Joke Friday

(I was actually relieved that I didn't remember them all)

DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN...?

All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?
It took five minutes for the TV warm up?
Nearly everyone's Mom was at home when the kids got home from school?
Nobody owned a purebred dog?
When a quarter was a decent allowance?
You'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?
Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?
All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had
their hair done every day and wore high heels?
You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped,
without asking, all for free, every time?
And you didn't pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?
Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?
It was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner
at a real restaurant with your parents?
They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed. . .and they did?
When a 57 Chevy was everyone's dream car...to cruise,
peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady?
No one ever asked where the car keys were
because they were always in the car,
in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?
Lying on your back in the grass with your friends
and saying things like, "That cloud looks like a ."
and playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game?
Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals
because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?
And with all our progress, don't you just wish, just once,
you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace,
and share it with the children of today?
When being sent to the principal's office was nothing
compared to the fate that awaited the student at home?
Basically we were in fear for our lives,
but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc.
Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!
But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.
Send this on to someone who can still remember
Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, Laurel and Hardy,
Howdy Dowdy and the Peanut Gallery,
the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows,
Nellie Bell, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk.

As well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball games,
Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool,
and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar.
Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember that"?

I am sharing this with you today
because it ended with a double dog dare to pass it on.
To remember what a double dog dare is, read on.
And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between
old enough to know better and too young to care.

How many of these do you remember?
Candy cigarettes
Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside
Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes
Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum
Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
Newsreels before the movie
P.F. Fliers
Telephone numbers with a word prefix....(Raymond 4-601).
Party lines
Peashooters
Howdy Dowdy
45 RPM records
Green Stamps
Hi-Fi's
Metal ice cubes trays with levers
Mimeograph paper
Beanie and Cecil
Roller-skate keys
Cork pop guns
Drive ins
Studebakers
Washtub wringers
The Fuller Brush Man
Reel-To-Reel tape recorders
Tinkertoys
Erector Sets
The Fort Apache Play Set
Lincoln Logs
15 cent McDonald hamburgers
5 cent packs of baseball cards -
with that awful pink slab of bubble gum
Penny candy
35 cent a gallon gasoline
Jiffy Pop popcorn

Do you remember a time when...
Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"?
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?
Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening?
It wasn't odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?
The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties"?
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?
A foot of snow was a dream come true?
Saturday morning cartoons weren't 30-minute commercials for action figures?
"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?
War was a card game?
Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?
If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!

Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from
their "grown-up" life . . .I double-dog-dare-ya!