My dog Jackson

Isn't he cute? I was thinking my site needs some pics. So here is the sweet boy; our 1yr. old Black Lab.

Meme baton

I'm not sure what a meme is but I know what to do with a baton. Since my dear friend, Patti, has passed it to me and I always do what she tells me here goes:

You are stuck inside Fahrenheit 451. Which book do you want to be?

The Foot book by Dr. Seuss since I think I already know it by heart.

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

I named my only son Luke, after the name of the brother in Prince of Tides. But it's been so long since I've read it I would have to go back and read it again to figure out why. I was mesmerized by that book though I remember.

The last book you bought is?

Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst- I must be honest tho, I bought it at a discount store because it was cheap and looked like a good beach book.

What are you currently reading?

Here's your Hat What's your Hurry by Elizabeth McCracken(short stories) which I bought at a yard sale 2 wks. ago for 10 cents. I liked the title (its' an expression I use actually). I also liked the title of the 1st story - It's bad luck to die, which was different at first but just okay. The book I'm going to read next it sitting on my night table - it's Anita Shreve's Weight of Water. I really wanted to read the one about the old friends that meet again on the beach but my local librarian told me I had to read this one first. Not sure I should've listenend to her, I still want to read that other one.

Five books you would take to a deserted island

Oh boy -I hate this question. You know how I hate making decisions so I will just be vague.
1. Something Zen-like or spiritual
2. Something by Tolstoy or another classic I haven't read
3. A poetry book by Stanley Kunitz.
4. One of the 12 writing books staring down at me from this desk because now I will have time to read it and maybe actually "just do it".
5. And maybe one of my Piano books, also gathering dust. Alot of good that would be on a deserted island; unless the luxury liner that I was on - the grand piano was my means of escape.

Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons) and why?

I'm going to pass the meme baton to Jeannette at Musings of a Middle-aged Woman cause hers is one of my favorite blogs - i love her wit and down to earthinesss. And to my co-worker Robin Puccini at cc jellybeans and also dotmoms, which was recently written up (as well as Robin) in Forbes. And to Michelle at Writersattic because I recently entered a contest on her very interesting website. My apologizes to the above on my not being blog savvy enough to create links to their blogs. Hopefully with Robin's help I will be able to in the near future.

New found respect

I have always been in awe of writers, how they get it all down, the dialogue, the plot but most of all the daily grind. As much as I love writing, getting those words down on paper everyday, well that's a job. A labor of love but work nonetheless.I love when a poem just comes to me, when it seems like I am just putting the pen to the paper, the words flowing effortlessly. This is usually easy because I am an emotional mess and the poem is a catharsis and I feel so much better getting it out on paper. But to sit down and pick up where you left off mid sentence and create something from scratch, a real true to life character day in & day out that is really something.


Been busy with the office politics and writing my rebuttal to my review. We'll see where this gets me( to the door probably). The thing I've been really mad about tho is that during my review I saw a letter from the CEO saying how he had poured over these reviews ( yea, trying to make us look bad) and if anyone thought it unfair that they should know that upon review it would be less! The absolute gall! Maybe the reason he is so fat and puffed up is because his balls are so big they wrapped themselves around him. No one should think himself so powerful. Bastard.

Had the crap beat out of me today

I apologize if I've offended anyone with this title but that is really how I feel and I don't know how else to say it. Don't know if I even have the strength to write about it. Of course I mean figuratively but my head is pounding all the same. Feel like I was chewed up and spit out. The old little guy goes up against the establishment story- never a pretty story. First punch: I find out that our health insurance is being changed again, down to the worst possible coverage with a large deductible. I basically work for insurance now but in addition to the 8500 a yr. that I pay they are now increasing the deductible to 2500 so that's 10K for Insurance. Hillary where are you now. I've figured out that I'd be better off divorcing my husband and going on Mass. Health ( Medicaid) and getting laid off and collecting. Well after the insurance debacle and to add insult to injury literally I had my review. 1%! Now this is when I could really real off the expletives but I wont'. I've worked for this company for 13 yrs. and if they're that bad offthey can keep their blankin quarter, I don't need it that bad. Oh yea, I forgot I do, have to pay that deductible. Talk about yr. double whammy. Good thing there is no ice cream in the house but I think I hear the cereal calling me. Need some comfort food.


I don't think many people read this but that's okay cause I think I am really writing if for my self anyway. I'm a sporadic journal writer from way back. What do people do with those things. My friend got divorced becasue of one. She said the priest she spoke to about her husbands said, " Why do they write in those things!" Tho she writes in one now, tho she doesn't have to worry about anyone reading it i guess. I sometime wonder if my husband has read mine and if so why he hasnt' left me yet ( but that's another topic).
I actually was thinking that I hadn't written in here in awhile when I was moving some summer clothes from the extra bedroom/computer room/den - this is the smallest room in the house and the most popular. Has TV/PS2/computer so we are all usually vying for it - yes we are a 1 computer family. I want my own Laptop for the kitchen - someday. Seems I've gotten off the track here again, what a surprise.
OH yea, so I was moving the clothes, when I noticed that everything is black(of course), white, denim or khaki. What does this mean? that I'm a Gap dresser? So they are back on the Futon behind me - they almost made it to the closet. I was going to try and explain what i've been up to ( why i haven'posted in 3 days , now 5 but it would be all excuses anyway so let's just skip it and leave it at I'm sporadic at best. 1) occurring at irregular intervals; having no pattern or order. That sounds like me.


Ok first i will say it is late and I am forcing myself to write; reminds me of when I was a kid and had to practice piano when I wanted to go outside and play. I just want to go to bed now. But I jotted down an experience that I had yesteday and before I forget I guess I should get it down on paper. I was at work the other day mechanically going about my job, as I usually do, when I called in a patient that I recognized. I immediateyly knew the face and she was smiling at me. I remembered that we had talked and had real converstations in the past. She told me that she was so glad when she saw me because she was so nervous about her eyes. That made me feel good that perhaps I do serve a purpose on this earth.

deli number

Funny thing happened the other day when I was waiting in the deli line. It was fairly busy but when i checked my number it didn't seem like I had enough time to do the supermarket sweep routine(you know sprint to the other end of the store for toilet paper and cat food). So I decided to wait patiently(which is unusual for me). As I was standing their waiting I had an out of body experience of sorts; suddenly I was in my garden figuring out where to put some plants. When I remember andlooked up to the counter above I saw that the number was on the number past my number; my number had been called! I stood there kinda sputtering for a moment: uh uh my my number with number in hand held high. The woman who had taken my place with her number was appologizing even tho it was clearly my mistake and I told her it was. So I don't know what is better the sprint to the TP aisle for the aerobic value & time mangement or smelling the imaginary roses.

Ready to give up

Just when I thought I was on a roll here the evil sisters Doom and Gloom have reared their ugly faces to rain on my parade. Despite nice reviews by 2 actual bloggers and a graphic artist friend I seem ready to throw in the towel. Don't know if is is sheer laziness or lack of belief in myself or maybe just lack of direction. Or maybe the honeymoon is over and now it is too much like work and I don't really know what to write about or why.
When I was out in my garden today (when I was supposed to be making dinner) see I never do what I'm supposed to be doing. I was thinking about how much I like gardening ( where I can see the fruits of my labor). I was thinking if only I could drink coffe all morning, work in my garden all day and drink wine all nite. Of course I'd have to add some carbs and greens to that diet and chocolate of course. well i am running out of steam here so maybe I'll see you tomorrow unless i'm planting daisies.

Forcing myself

Ok its' sunday morning and I've had my coffee, put in a load of laundry and drove the kid to baseball practice. I don't have a clue of what I am writing about here; I think I am just avoiding cleaning the bathrooms and the nasty cat box. Actually my yard work is beckoning me cause it is a beautiful day and a legitimate excuse not to do housework. My motto is just keep moving, don't give your right name. I guess I've always been good at excuses. I remember in High School when we were going over some kids house for basically a makeout party - music/low lights in someones basement. Loved those finished basements - away from the peering eyes of grown ups. I usually used the movie excuse and researched what it was about and everything. Ready with my lie.
Just reread the part about the legitimate excuse, I guess Imust feel blogging is not legitimate cause it just seems like dear diary; don't know where I am going with it. But it appeals to my underfed creative self. The garden is beckoning. I know Patti I always bail just when I'm getting going. Lazy Leo.

Best little time wasters

My best friend used to say that we were the best little time wasters in the world. I can remember going over her house for coffee in the morning and shooting the shit. Rehashing the events of the day or night before (this was in the days of disco - another story). Then we would have lunch and before you knew it it was tea time or if we were feeling particularly wasteful and had some extra dough we would head downtown for Bart's chocolate cake, the best chocolate cake ever.

So this morning that phrase came to mind when I was driving around to yard sales with my son. And now here i am online on the computer ( another little timewaster) but the clock is ticking and it's almost noon so the fun is over have to race to the bank fore 12 and then lunch for the kid and endless laundry and chores. Ho hum.


Found my old HS boyfriend online and It has reminded me of all the changes I have been through or all the different people I have been. There was the Baton Twirling drama queen in HS. Then a quick stint as College student, quickly followed by college drop out. Then there was the Hippie stage ( my personal favorite). THen there was a lost stage ( that was a long one - sometime I think i might still be stuck in that one). And there was the barfly ( i was in the restaurant business - bartender for years). Then I got a real job in the Medical field ( whick I am still stuck in). And then the best job of all - Mom. In between I also worked for a boat charter company and for a TV. station ( my dream job); but that was in the Virgin Islands and I moved back to the states and they rest is history as they say.

Another day

Well I had good intentions of writing in here and also turning over my garden but my old back is telling me to just go lie down. I have 1/2 hr. before my 11 yr. old's baseball game begins. As for the failures; who wants to relive them. My 13th wedding anniversary last night. I'm living one right now: my marraige - a terrible failure except for that 11 yr. old. Gotta go watch the game. I know if I'd only finish something I started, my age old problem. But I started another poetry blog, wish someone could tell me how to add a link to them here. This is my ADD style of blogging I guess; similar to my ADD style of housecleaning; just jump from one thing to another and never finish anything. Well as Scarlett would say, "I'll just think about that tomorrow".