Sunday Sampler

From the Happiness Blog

I like them all but especially #'s 4,5,6,7, & 11; but not #12!

Nineteen Tips for Cheering Yourself Up -- from 200 Years Ago.

I've posted this list before, but I love it, so am supplying it again. I read it in a biography of the English writer Sydney Smith, in Hesketh Pearson’s The Smith of Smiths. In 1820, Smith wrote a letter to an unhappy friend, Lady Morpeth, in which he offered her tips for cheering up.

I have my own variety of tips lists for cheering up, and I was interested to hear what someone from two centuries ago would recommend. Most of Smith's suggestions are as sound now as they were almost 200 years ago -- "attend to the effects tea and coffee produce upon you" for example, is thoroughly modern. A few, though, are amusingly odd. It might be tougher today to work "good blazing fires" into everyday life.

My favorites are #1, 3, 6, 13, 15, 16, and 17.

“1st. Live as well as you dare.
2nd. Go into the shower-bath with a small quantity of water at a temperature low enough to give you a slight sensation of cold, 75 or 80 degrees.
3rd. Amusing books.
4th. Short views of human life—not further than dinner or tea.
5th. Be as busy as you can.
6th. See as much as you can of those friends who respect and like you.
7th. And of those acquaintances who amuse you.
8th. Make no secret of low spirits to your friends, but talk of them freely—they are always worse for dignified concealment.
9th. Attend to the effects tea and coffee produce upon you.
10th. Compare your lot with that of other people.
11th. Don’t expect too much from human life—a sorry business at the best.
12th. Avoid poetry, dramatic representations (except comedy), music, serious novels, melancholy, sentimental people, and everything likely to excite feeling or emotion, not ending in active benevolence.
13th. Do good, and endeavour to please everybody of every degree.
14th Be as much as you can in the open air without fatigue.
15th. Make the room where you commonly sit gay and pleasant.
16th. Struggle by little and little against idleness.
17th. Don’t be too severe upon yourself, or underrate yourself, but do yourself justice.
18th. Keep good blazing fires.
19th. Be firm and constant in the exercise of rational religion.
20th. Believe me, dear Lady Georgiana.”

What rings true for you?

Photohunter

This weeks theme: Daily

Dreams

Dreamt about that old brown Rambler, that I still have it - a reoccurring dream. What does it mean? Vestige of my past that I'm trying to hold on to? reclaim? reinvent myself again?

I bought that brown Rambler on the Vineyard - another one of my $500 specials. Had a lot of those. My first car was a Red Rambler - push button convertible that my uncle, who had a gas station in the Bronx, got for me. I thought i was very cool at college with that car. But back to the brown rambler - when i moved to the Boston area it was a liability - i was forever getting tickets til i finally got the boot - a huge metal contraption so you couldn't drive off til they eventually towed it away and impounded it. I remember I paid more than i paid for the car to get it out. I wanted them to just keep the car but they told me I'd still owe the money. Then when i moved in town and i didn't use the car much, cept on wkends to get out of town, i would invariably lose it. I literally would forget where i parked it after a week and have to go look for it. So I sometimes have this dream that i still have the car and i'm looking for it.

Did a search of "dreams" on my blog.

What strange/reoccurring dreams do you have??

Joke Friday

A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday.

She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.

On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper. 

Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my asking, 

but how old do you think I am 

'About 32,' is the reply.'

'Nope! I'm exactly 50,' the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same

question.

The girl replies, 'I'd guess about 29.'

The woman replies with a big smile, 'Nope, I'm 50.'

Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the 

street.She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the 

clerk this burning question.

The clerk responds, 'Oh, I'd say 30...'

Again she proudly responds, 'I'm 50, but thank you!

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man 

waiting next to her the same question. He replies, 'Lady, I'm 78 

and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there

was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.

It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.

Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are...'

They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the

best of her..

She finally blurts out, 'What the hell, go ahead.'

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, 'Okay, okay.....How old am I?'

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says,

'Madam, you are 50.'

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, 'That was incredible, how could you tell?'

The old man says, 'Promise you won't get mad?'

'I promise I won't' she says. 

'I was behind you at McDonalds.' 

Photohunter

This weeks theme: cuddly

My old (deceased) cat, Dakota. He may look cuddly but he was a force to be reckoned with.

Joke Friday

"THE MAN OF THE HOUSE"

A husband stormed into the kitchen and announced to his wife, "From now on, you
need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is Law. You
will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my
meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert.

After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have the
kind of sex that I want. Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so
I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my
robe. Then, you will massage my feet and hands. Then tomorrow, guess
who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"

The wife replied, "The fuckin' funeral director, would be my first guess!"

Photohunter take 2

This weeks theme: broken

Just remembered this photo of my sweet puppy, Jackson, now almost 6.

Photohunter

This weeks theme: broken

Joke Friday

Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister asked, 'How many of you have forgiven your enemies?'

80% held up their hands.

The Minister then repeated his question.

All responded this time, except one small elderly lady.

'Mrs. Neely?'; 'Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?'

I don't have any.' She replied, smiling sweetly.

'Mrs. Neely, that is very unusual. How old are you?'

'Ninety-eight.' she replied.

'Oh, Mrs. Neely, would you please come down in front & tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years & not have an enemy in the world?'
The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said:

'I've outlived the bitches.'