Too pooped to post or Just shoot me

This weekend almost killed me, or the past 3 days I should say (Friday was my day off -ha! - I'm almost looking forward to work tomorrow cause it will be easier than juggling a 12 yr. old boy and 86 yr. old MIL(mother-in-law). I was just going to cruise my fav blogs as the title *belies my state of mind, but then i got the pull - that gravitational tug. Anyway the 2nd part of the title - Just shoot me - became my key phrase this wkend. and my (wonderful) son/ (beautiful) boy heard me and said - "hey, that can be the title of your book", my perceptive Pisces - what a dreamer.
Well to say this weekend was grueling, would be an understatement. Too many balls in the air (remember the real estate course that I'm supposedly studying for - bedtime reading - really! but I am already working it - did some photos for my friends listing). See i just like the creative side of it - the picture taking and copy writing. just goes to show ya, as they say.
anyway, back to the story at hand, put in 10 hrs. on friday , madly unpacking. then back sat. for some more, after dropping the boy at the ball field for a 2 hr. practice; then some shopping for needed items at the new place. Today we dropped her at the apt. with the new things to do some work on her own, while I took the boy to sunday school and then to baseball pics. then back to help MIL, then finally back home to do yard work, then to the food store, a couple of loads of laudry and here I sit, not for long - time to unload the dryer and fold.

*(i like the sound of that word, but just looked it up and I guess it is out of context here - but as i said , i just like it, so it stays)

Joke Friday

Bus Crash
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck,
and everyone inside dies.
They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief
they have experienced; he decides to grant them one wish each,
before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish
is.
"I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it
is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be
gorgeous too.
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while with each one asking to be gorgeous
but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in the line
starts laughing.
When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the
floor, laughing his head off.
Finally, God reaches the last guy and asks him what his wish
will be.
The guy eventually calms down and says:

"Make 'em all ugly again".

SO THE NEXT TIME YOU'RE 'LAST IN LINE'...BE HAPPY!

busy, busy,busy

Well, I was always a good one for excuses and little white lies ( sometimes not so little). But folks, I am hearby exclaiming I am in over my head but as long as no other body parts fail me, i'll survive. The MIL (mother-in-law) did finally make up her mind and has moved from lovely NJ to wonderful Massachusetts. So tomorrow is the big moving day. She arrived late last night afer a horrific afternoon of fighting (well being walked all over by the movers), then getting in the car with her son and driving 7&1/2 hrs. here. They both looked like they'd been raked over the coals. I spent a couple of hours on the phone with the **%&$**%*#* movers today and managed to recoup some money; well they are gouging us $800 less. That," I'm calling the Attorney General's" does work. So tomorrow the moving clothes go on, so glad i have the day off. Now, when am I going to get down to studying for that dumb real estate test?

Do you do this?

Do you sometimes post, just to get that previous post out of there - the glaring first thing someone sees when they discover you. Do you get that obligated (oh no i have homework to do) feeling about posting - like when you are hypercritical about everything you write - like this is just drivel? Well i'm here to say it's our drivel and knock that internal critic to the moon, tell him to get the hell out of your way; this space is yours and yours only. Yea right. I guess we do need the irritating little fellow or g-d knows what would wind up here. See there he snuck in again, wiley guy isn't he? What are your idiosyncrasies(as far as writing)? Sitting here trying to decide between the post or delete button - who wins?

Toast

Just got out of a 12 (well ok only 10) hr. real estate class. Feel like I just had a basketball full of information jammed into my pea size brain. I can't remember the last time I even took an 1-2 hr. class - yea i can - CPR maybe 2-3 yrs. ago, and there you got to play with dummys. And the worst thing is that I have to get up and do it again tomorrow. Better get some brain sleep.

Joke Friday

THIS IS FOR SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN I THINK CAN HANDLE IT


WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse."So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked."No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)I know I'm not going to understand women.I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,and still be afraid of a spider.
MARRIAGE SEMINAR While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes."He addressed the man, "Can you name your wife's favorite flower?"Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles.The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.She directs him down the correct aisle.A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?He answers, " You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper.So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.( I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton! )
WIFE VS. HUSBAND A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?""Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
W O R D S A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day.. 30,000 to a man's 15,000.The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
CREATION A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!WHO DOES WHATA man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee. "Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.........."HEBREWS"
THE SILENT TREATMENT A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

Manic Monday

Just another manic monday, wish it was Sunday - well i don't know about that- Sunday was pretty manic too. Let's see Sat. I did a ton of yard work ( but i found a $50 bill by the side of the road, that made it worthwhile - i think). Then Sun.-Easter- went to work at the Club to bartend/cashier, back home to finish the yard work, then quilt made me play ball with the boy - he taught me some pitching techniques. But the downside of all this, is that my arm is feeling the effects of all this activity; Ok Now we get to Monday:worked all day doin eye exams, then had a committee meeting that i was vouluteered to. But generally i just hate mondays, cause it's so hard getting back into the swing of things - no wonder.

Happy Eastover

Joke Friday

A woman in her fifties is at home, unclothed, happily jumping on her bed and squealing with delight.
Her husband watches her for a while and asks, "Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look? What's the matter with you?"
The woman continues to bounce on the bed and says, "I don't care what you think. I just came from having a mammogram, and the doctor says that not only am I healthy, but I have the breasts of an 18 year-old.
The husband replies, "What did he say about your 55-year old ass?"
"Your name never came up," she replied.

(Once again, sorry guys :)

Fifteen minutes of fame

Well, my fifteen minutes of fame (wasn't it Andy Warhol that coined that phrase?) are over; now what? I must admit that even tho the shy virgo in me was aghast at being caught "with her pants down", the Leo in me totally enjoyed the attention ( the virgo(critic) realizes that somehow doesn't sound right, but i'm too tired to care . So looking for more attention....over at my New Poems blog I've posted my first ever attempt at Haiku-it was fun, kind of.
Someone left a comment once, asking if anyone knew of my poetry site(side) of me; so I guess I will toot my horn as they say and direct anyone who hasn't found it on their own to go to a peek. As writing goes I guess I consider myself a poet first, journal writer(blogger) second and aspiring comedic writer, journalist, wannabee short story/novel writer last.

Cat got your tongue?

Tongue tied. What can I say?
Well the pressure is on now - dear FTS has sent folks my way and I'm feeling like i've been caught with my pants down,for lack of a better expression. Oh but as usual I can give you plenty of excuses why. I have been dealing with my mother-in-law, whom i really like, before you get me wrong. Actually i probably(really) get along better with her than I do my husband. She is 86 and really with it, fun to be around, funny and no problem at all - she even cleans my house. She lives alone in NJ and we've been trying to get her to move near one of her 4 kids for years. Her apartment situation is not good at all and she came up about a week ago to revisit an independent living place in our town and agreed to take the apt.; we even picked rug and wall colors, talked about celebrating, jumped up and down and then I come home from taking the boy to sunday school and she announces she's having second thoughts. So- many hours/phone call to the other siblings and we are still no closer to a resolution. As my mother would've said,"Que sera sera" - What will be, will be. That said, I must say it was a thrill to discover that I was FTS's Blog of the week. Thanks FTS and welcome anyone who stops by, I will try and be properly dressed next time you stop by.

Joke Friday

A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to Eisenhower hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience.
Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.

While crossing Bob Hope Drive on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"

God replied: "I didn't recognize you".

Perfect job

The other day this wild idea popped into my head - I thought of what the perfect job for me would've been: for those of you old enough (oh yea reruns)to remember the DicK Van Dyke show; i thought i'd like to be Sally (tho thinner and cuter - remember she couldn't get good dates), brainstorming skits, comedy with those two, dick van dyke and buddy. Or maybe better yet, Mary Tyler Moore. Just like now I always say what's a nice Jewish girl like me doing working for the doctor, i should be married to him; or even better - the other thing i always say to patients when they ask, "what's the doctor going to do?"; I say," yea, I guess I should be the poster child for Stay in school." It would be nice to have his paycheck stead of mine.

Seriously i always wanted to work in TV/film-production/editing.

What is/was your dream job?

Yippee the science fair is over!

That's not a baseball in his hand it's the model eye, tho next stop after the way too long day at the fair was baseball leveling. We even squeezed in a haircut after all this; he's much handsomer than these pics.

Boy puts head in croc!!!!

Happy April Fools!!!
Pic(friend's grandson)from our trip - becoming a distant memory. Will have to post more about it later. We laughed our pants off about this pic tho - I think he has a future in acting, don't you?