Joke Friday


Well I started the week with Manic Monday, followed by Terrible Tuesday, skipped humpday (wednesday) played instead and Thurs.I managed to change the template of my blog "all my myself", got rid of that awful white print and posted a saved draft about my favorite subject. Wish I was more computer savvy and could really change things but I will have to settle for just being able to get my links back for now. Anyway, I thought I would end the week with a joke(I used to know a few from when I was a bartender and then there are the ones I get sent- i'll see what I can come up with) and maybe start a new tradition here, I hope I don't offend anyone.

A recently divorced woman spent the day packing her belongings into boxes,crates, and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar,and abottle of Chardonnay.
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the
first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried
everything, cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead
rodents and the carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung
everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during
which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to
replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to
work in the house. The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench
any longer and decided to move. A month later, even though they had cut
their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.

Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to return
their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank
to purchase a new place. The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things
were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back. Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the
moving company pack everything to take to their new home, including the curtain rods.



FTS said...

Ha! Sweet revenge! LOL

melly said...

I'm truly sorry but I don't have time to read (as you can figure out from my rare and short posts lately).
I just popped in to see how you were doing with the template.
Good job!
We should both be very proud of you :)